Pirate finance

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Image: © RAWKU5 | sxc.hu

Yaaarrr me ‘arties!

‘Twas sailing me schooner into Shanghai Harbour not three winters past, and shiver me timbers those treacherous Chinese merchants would accept none of me recently acquired doubloons and pieces of eight! Yarrrr.

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Booze, bombs and booty

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Book review of My Life as a Mexican Pirate: A True Story by Mark Zolo.

Mark Zolo always took things a bit too far.  Back in the day I would check his site, Naughty Nomad, for its city reports before taking on a new international gig.  I liked to know beforehand whether dating would be possible there, and whether this would get my head cut off.

I did minimum two year contracts.  It’s a factor.  Don’t come for me.

But when I went on a week-long trip somewhere, I really could not be bothered trying to pick up girls and find a place to take them in a hostel dormitory.  The one time I went to Russia (Saik!  I’m not Russian), I was far more interested in hiking and seeing historical sites than bedding local women.  Between finding a place to stay, avoiding pros, and bringing along clothes suitable for a nightspot, it didn’t seem like it was worth it.

To Mark, it is always worth it.

For me, [traveling alone] meant doing just enough sight-seeing to stave off guilt, then bar hopping and chasing tail.

The places he’s been and the things he’s done to experience danger and pick up hoochimamas are astonishing.  As a result, this is the most bizarre and extreme travel book you’ll ever read.

I remember back in the day, he Read More

Twists and Roundabouts

I’m wrenched awake by a gut-churning headache. It might be the altitude. I’m in a tent somewhere in the mountains, long before dawn, far from home. I fumble around in my backpack for my ‘Vitamin I’ (Ibuprofen) and realize that I’m all out. Oh, shit.

I force my agony-fogged brain to calculate.

Continuing the hike as planned goes in the ‘ha ha’ basket. Once I get a headache like this I need drugs or I’m out of action for days. For this reason and many others I would never have survived in the pre-industrial era.

I can drive into the nearest town pretty easily. Problem is, it’s 4am. Pharmacies won’t open until 10. I could get home by then, take the drugs there, then sleep in my own bed.

Can I get home? Physically, can I drive that far in this condition?

Maybe not, but it looks like the best of a bad set of options. My study of the Stoics shall be tested. I cannot control painful events, but I can choose how to react to them. On this occasion I choose to react by spitting obscene language and furiously kicking objects that get in my way as I start gathering my stuff.

Bending down is a really bad thing for headaches. Probably that’s what extraordinary rendition camps do to suspected terrorists. Induce a headache then scatter a bunch of irresistible goat porn on the cell floor. You know what else really requires a lot of bending down? Packing up a tent. My condition worsens until I

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What You Need to Know Before You Consider Living in Another Country – My New Post at Return of Kings

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My new post is up at Return of Kings:

Are you considering a life-changing leap to greener pastures? This is an overview of some legal issues you’ll need to understand before you squeeze into an economy-class A380 seat and hurtle toward your new life. We’ll look at visas, tax, pensions, and divorce laws.

Disclaimer: I’m not a legal professional. My qualification is endless, exhilarating hours waiting in the crowded immigration offices of various foreign lands, negotiating bureaucracies, and checking out the multicultural talent. I’ve spent even longer hours boozing with grizzled veterans of the expat life, boasting or wailing of their experiences at the hands of the omnipotent authorities.

Visas

Unlike the West, plenty of foreign countries are pretty fussy about who they let in. And why shouldn’t they be? It’s their country. Remember, you don’t argue with the nightclub bouncer whose job is to keep out the riffraff. You put on a tie, or you take your business elsewhere.

There are four main categories of visas for living overseas long term:

Working Or Business Visas

These are visas that allow you to work or do business legally in another country. Unless you’re independently wealthy or planning on moving to a corrupt, third world country where such requirements can easily be flouted, you’ll probably need one of these bad boys. Yeah, I know Mexicans get away with doing cheeky illegal work in the US. That doesn’t mean you’re going to get away with it in Singapore.

Different countries vary widely in their requirements for a working visa. Some demand a university degree or need you to have a . . .

Read the rest of the article at Return of Kings.

 

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