Expats Frozen in Time

I knew this Aussie in Japan.  He’d left Melbourne in the 1990s and his style, his way of speaking and his general outlook were very much Melbourne 1997.  He even says ‘grouse‘.  In Melbourne today you wouldn’t find a guy like that.

I met some Americans who’d been in Japan since the 1980s.  They still had Read More


Tuning Out

I lived for two years in a remote village in rural Japan.  There was no free-to-air TV reception.  If I wanted TV and internet the cable connection would cost ¥3000 a month so I chose not to bother.

I am a cheap bastard.

I briefly checked news headlines and my email every couple of days on a shared computer at work, and I borrowed 80s anime DVDs from the local video library.  That was the totality of my connection.

Life was zen.  I worried little about the world’s problems because I heard little about them.  The 2008 financial crisis swept past me like an autumn breeze through an ancient cedar.  I noticed a few headlines and thought, hmm, that’s a pity, and forgot about it.  I didn’t constantly check my investments because I couldn’t, and I wasn’t panicked anyway because I didn’t know that everyone else was.  I now know my funds must have lost about a third of their value and then gradually clawed it back.  Best not to think too much about these things.

Once I was back in civilization and got a smartphone I found I could waste a lot of time overreading news and blogs.  This is my main challenge in terms of self-control.

On the other hand, I didn’t hear about some big developments and opportunities.  I missed out on the big money with Bitcoin.  I only encountered the Manosphere in 2009 – I could have done with that wisdom earlier.  I would also have benefited from easier access to information about training, nutrition, home remedies for minor ailments and other things.  There’s also a noticeable gap in my knowledge of world events around that time –  I’m normally one of those annoying bastards who reads all the news religiously and has an opinion on everything.

I think of this now because by the time you read this I will be even more disconnected.  I will be quite chilled about the disasters taking place around the world but will be dreadfully uninformed about useful things.

Anyway, here’s a clip that you have the bandwidth to play and I don’t.  Enjoy.

Into the Heart of Darkness

As mentioned earlier, I am going to disappear for a while.  I am moving to Darkest Africa, where limited internet bandwidth and poor smoke signal visibility will mean that I will be unable to access WordPress.

But it will not look like it!  Using the magic of scheduling, pre-written posts will appear automatically each Monday just as though everything is normal, even though savages will be tearing strips of flesh from my face at the very same time you are reading my scintillating anecdote about my awkward date with a Korean midget who I didn’t know was a midget until I met her in real life.

I will not be around to respond to comments.  Well I will eventually, once I’ve gotten out and put band-aids on each of my AK-47 wounds and hyena bites.  I’ll try to check in a few times a year.

Behave yourselves.

The Most Enjoyable Election Comments on Jezebel

You know the funnest thing in the world?  No, it’s not those clubs in Japan where you can watch the ladies above you above shit on a perspex floor.  No, it’s even funner than that.  It’s free.  And you can do it right now, without getting up or putting on your underwear.

  1.  Go to Jezebel.
  2.  Click on an election-related article.
  3.  Read the comments.

Better than chocolate sex.

All sic:


I’m crying because I don’t know how the fuck were going to survive a trump presidency.  And if he wins this isn’t my country, period. It’s every man for themselves. FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING LIBERAL WHITE MEN. FUCK YOU.

Why is she blaming liberal white men?  To answer logically would be to answer wrongly.  The important thing is, those overweight angry women never liked the skinny bearded ones at all.  And who can blame them.  Note to the skinny bearded ones: lift and eat meat.  Then it will all start to make sense.  Oh, and switch to Read More

Quiet Word From the Dark Side, 3/10/16

Hello, lovelies.

Bertrand Russell is the only one who correctly predicted the future.  The old dirtbag read my mind before I was born.

Delicious Tacos goes to see Emma Sulkowicz.  And, Cry All You Want.

Against Interminable Arguments.

The URL cats.com is for sale.

Another view of the replication crisis.

Look before you leap in North Korea.

Cat ladies and childlessness are pushing America off a cliff.

From The Empty Subject: The Scapegoat and Do What You Love .

Trump supporters are like naughty children who Read More

How to Meditate


In ancient Japan, so the legend goes, samurai attacked a temple during a political conflict between Shinto and Buddhism.  The warriors were astonished to find monks kneeling in tranquil reflection while they were being slaughtered.  Ever practical, the samurai realized that meditation could be harnessed to achieve god-like stillness of mind even amid the fury and terror of battle.  Zen Buddhism was born and few outsiders fucked with the insanely battle-ready samurai for centuries – with a bit of help from the odd typhoon.

Today, a man still requires mental calm most during stressful times: talking to hoochi mamas, pitching a fraudulent business plan or helping a friend who is on fire.  He might also wish to Read More