Drugs are M’Kaaaay

Have you seen Little Miss Sunshine?  I highly recommend it.  I watched it on a date once and reaped a Thai flag.  Not the most challenging one.

There’s a scene where the grandpa is talking about drugs.  He says that young people would be mad to do it, but old people would be mad not to.  They’re going to Read More

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Shithole

So Trump may or may not have called African countries ‘shitholes’.  It caused a bit of a stir over here in sunny Bumfuckistan.  I happened to meet some US diplomatic staff at a pizza place shortly afterwards and I asked for their reaction.

“Well, it’s true, but it’s not helpful to say it,” was the most common response.  I asked one fella what he’d say if directly confronted by local officials about it.  This was the speech he had prepared: Read More

How to chill under stress

Regular readers will know I live in one of the worst countries in the world, I am being constantly slandered and undermined by a very well-connected personage, and that I’ve decided to stick it out for the remainder of my contract just for the bucks and the chance to escape the rat race altogether.

I have realized that the key to survival here, aside from staying fit and working on my projects, is not to Read More

Friendship and slavery

I am not good at making friends.  The main reason for this is that I do not like many other people and I find I have little in common with the rest of the human race.  Those friends I do have tend to be quite eccentric, tolerant people. The average person cannot put up with me for long, and I am also impatient with others.

It’s difficult to be friends with locals here.  Their main topic of conversation is Read More

Uptick in Crime

There’s recently been an increase in crime here.

This used to be one of the safest cities in Africa.  Perhaps it still is.  However, various factors are leading to the breakdown of old certainties.  Let us first look at the nature of crime here, then examine underlying causes.

But wait – should we not first consider why this place was so orderly to begin with?  Because that demands some explanation.  This is Africa, after all.  So let’s start there.

I am not a criminologist so I don’t really understand the details, but religion certainly plays a major role.  The people here are about evenly split between Read More

The Four Chinese Balls

A while ago Xi Jinping was effectively made President for Life.  The Chinese Communist Party got rid of this institution after Mao died because he lasted long past his use-by date, but now it’s back.  Because Xi Jinping knows better than everyone else what they should do, because he’s more specialer.

There were 2,958 in favour and two votes against.

Two.

From this we may conclude that Read More

What Xi Jinping ought to have said

At the last big Chinese Communist Party shindig Xi Jinping was appointed President for Life and gave a tremendously important speech.  It was just what you’d expect – those naughty Taiwanese better behave themselves, I’ll crack down on corruption, China is awesome, all those other countries are stupid little girly countries who probably don’t even have system of writing yet, etc., etc.

Here’s the speech he should have given: Read More