The sudden and unexpected death of dating


Note the plesiosaur in the background.  Image from Wikipedia.

If you’re an old fart like me you would have once called up a young lady on the home phone.  Her dad would answer and he would stir you a bit before he put her on.  If ethnic he would just hang up.  You would talk to the girl for about five minutes and then get to the point of nervously asking her to a movie or party.  She would accept or decline.  Then you’d go ask if you could borrow the car.  You’d pick her up after making polite conversation with her parents.  Her mum would ask what you’re studying and her dad would want to know how long you’ve had your license.  You’d take her out and take her home again.  You’d see the same girl exclusively and you would be boyfriend and girlfriend.  Young people would say things like, ‘Are Jeff and Sue coming?’ and ‘Did you hear about Kate and Pete?  Hit a kangaroo and totaled the Camira.’

We were so modern and free thinking.  Sometimes the girl would be the one to drive or ask the guy out.  We would talk openly about sex and would discuss appropriate contraception.  Stable couples would get tests and go off condoms.  Since the 90s it had been normal for young couples, even 18 or 19 year olds, to go on trips together.  Modern, enlightened parents would not mind a partner staying over.  Obviously it was the same partner each time and it would be someone well known to the family.  Bad boys and druggos would be seen on the quiet.  But that’s the way it was.

Serial monogamy was the new pattern of relationships.  It was normal for young people to have several boyfriends or girlfriends before they found the right person and settled down.  Only the religious were virgins when they married though men would secretly have preferred to find one.  Most people had 5-10 partners, enough to sow their wild oats.  Cool guys had a really cute girlfriend.  Average guys had an average girlfriend.  Total losers were alone.  People would tell them, ‘You’ll find the right person some day.  Someone will like you as much as you like them.  There are plenty of fish in the sea.  You’ve just got to get out and meet people.’  And some of those things were somewhat true.

Exceptional guys went to nightclubs and actually picked up strangers.  They were the studs, and they were a tiny minority except for the rare stroke of luck that any fellow might occasionally enjoy.  Hence, ‘get lucky’.  Some girls would go out for new cock every weekend.  They were called ‘sluts’ back before it was cool.  Most people were primarily monogamous, spending from three months to three years with each partner while usually being faithful.

Then something happened, somewhere around 2002 – 2012.  Some blame the Internet after its innocent days of initial-letter capitalization were over.  Others, the delayed effects of modernity – contraception, women’s education and employment, and the decline of religion.  What was ultra-modern suddenly, in the space of around ten years, became a stodgy, old sexual economy anachronism.

Cool guys didn’t have a girlfriend anymore.  They had multiple girls with varying levels of seriousness, from lookers who might be invited to work functions right down to thirty-somethings they’d let come over for an hour on a Tuesday night.  Average guys struggled to get any attention, and would have to settle for a bullied relationship with a lower SMV skank.  The losers continued to get none but their future prospects had become much more bleak.

Girls no longer had boyfriends when they were aged 18-25.  They focused instead on their education and career and they chose casual encounters, either regular or off the specials menu, in order to sate their natural urges.  Nightclubs began to be disrupted by Tinder and its cousins.  Average girls would be able to shag the hottest 10-20% of guys so long as they behaved themselves and did not get ideas above their station.  Girls would complain about the lack of commitment, sexual pleasure and tenderness but would nevertheless fail to seek those goods out in the place where they lay – among the average men who still wanted a girlfriend.

Young people living at home could no longer invite their partners to stay because there would be too many of them, shocking their boomer parents who had thought they were so groovy.  The gulf between the generations had reemerged.  From free love to free fucks (for some).  Many young men retreated underground and their parents wondered what was wrong with them, but were powerless to help.

Women would plan to marry when they turned around thirty, but that plan often misfired for these reasons.

Ten years.  A societal change that would once have developed over centuries, in a decade.  And in the meantime we have had gay marriage, tranny rights, and the new ethical principal of open borders.  Everything is rape except rape.  Everything is offensive and problematic.  And there’s plenty more on the way.

This was once described as Future Shock – a state of being in which an exponentially increasing rate of technological and social change becomes too rapid for humans to psychologically adapt.  And then what?  Do we become extinct?  A sudden decline in population is certainly plausible.

And here, gentlemen reader, is the darkest fact of all: I may sound like I am mourning the death of dating, but in fact I am enjoying it.  Watching the increasing degeneracy of my erstwhile civilization gives me a Nero-like chill of cool excitement down my spine.  Like watching the public execution of a man who once called you a twerp, or that giddy flush of delight you get when a hot chick who ‘volunteers’ in Africa turns up in 48 pieces.  This is the age of the amoral libertine who can meet the requirements of his changing environment and flourish.

I do wonder, though: how long can I keep up?


Further reading:  Why I am not married

Follow SovietMen on Twatter: @nvladivostok1



  1. superslaviswife · August 30, 2016

    I think quite a few men who sit “on the margins” of society have the same outlook. Jon’s explanation is “they got what they wanted”. A friend got a foreign girl pregnant after a fairly abusive relationship. As the abuse got worse, she threatened to go to her home country. The whole friend circle was telling him this was the best option: no child support, no more abuse, no risk of seeing her again wandering about town, a clean slate, almost. Yet he didn’t listen. Now he’s in a mess ten times worse and may be a suicide risk. Some feel quite sorry for him. But Jon just says “he got what he wanted”. He had all the information and support he needed and still acted against it. He rejected his closest friends and turned our “local Alpha” against him for the sake of preserving that relationship. He made an “informed” decision and thus must have wanted the results.

    Liked by 1 person

    • CEO Nikolic · August 30, 2016

      What the fuck is Superslaviswife doing here? Is she literally EVERYWHERE?

      She’s following me. I know it. She’s obsessed. *cracking her on the skull with rapped knuckles*

      By the way … I have a comment for you Comrade. Read on.


  2. watchingitburn · August 30, 2016

    The most radical open shift in modern history and no one outside the manosphere talks about it. Hypergamy will blow up civilization quicker than climate change ever could have and not a single mainstream person has ever talked about it openly. The Taliban can’t hold a candle next to The sweeping destruction wrought by The groupies of local indie bands, and top athletes.The only hope is to leave the west. Like running from a crumbling fault line that chases you as you hope to jump to safety before you are swallowed into the abyss. Where do you land and for how long until Mark Zuckerberg pimps them into his digital harem? Cambodia?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Adam · August 30, 2016

      “The most radical open shift in modern history and no one outside the manosphere talks about it.”

      Not true.

      The courtship ritual that Nicolai described at the beginning of this post was designed, as Schneiderman notes, to protect women. As he says, traditional courtship evolved with the consent of women as it was to their advantage. Feminists greatest lie has been “Patriarchy!” which was completely intentional as their aim has not been to empower women but rather to break down all social cohesion around the traditional family unit, at which they have succeeded.

      The sudden rush of change that Nicolai talks about between 2002 and 2012 has its genesis dating back to 1968 and the beginnings of radical feminism. You could even trace it back to the early part of the 20th century and the suffrage movement which was primarily made up of women who didn’t like having sex with men. Viewed in that light it is not a sudden change at all, merely the culmination of many decades of coordinated effort.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Nikolai Vladivostok · August 31, 2016

        Perhaps it was the delayed effects of 1967 after events had time to unfold in a logical manner. I started writing a suggested process in this comment but found that it requires a complex flow-chart. Perhaps I’ll make it a future post.


  3. CEO Nikolic · August 30, 2016

    I think you’re exaggerating the situation somewhat for drama, but I enjoyed the most and its writing.

    I must say, for now, I prefer Delicious Tacos and his “environment of thought” to yours. Harsh, but true. There seems to be something withdrawn and gullible about your mindset, which detracts from the quality of its stylings and which renders some of what you say false-in-tone.

    But, having said that, I’ve memorized your website name — which is excellent memorable, anyways — and will be back again to partake. Maybe you’re having an off-day.

    Is it true you’re in Australia? How is it there?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. watchingitburn · August 30, 2016

    Good points, all. That’s good information, Adam. Awesome blog. These things have been brewing for a while but you know, Neurotic exaggeration= coping mechanism. I live in the US. I’m also an uneducated prole. That probably affects my view.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Nikolai Vladivostok · August 31, 2016

      You have a cool website name and concept but you don’t seem to be using it yet. Let me know if you add some content.


  5. redpillgirlnotes · August 30, 2016

    So true. God that’s depressing.


  6. CEO Nikolic · September 1, 2016

    Nikolai, don’t feed the animals. No chick is red pill or depressed over any of that; the only thing that depresses them is not having an alpha to turn from a wolf to their very own dog.

    Anyway, just a tip for you:

    On my website, today, I wrote a lengthy analysis about the Fall of the Soviet Union and its causes over the 70-year history of the regime. I thought you might want to look it over and comment. It’s from a Western perspective, but you seem to be a hybrid of East and West. I’d like you rinput.

    Not YOU redpillnotes, and not YOU slaviswife. You two can go on the bed and wait for me like good kittens. Clothing optional.


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