What You Need to Know Before You Consider Living in Another Country – My New Post at Return of Kings

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My new post is up at Return of Kings:

Are you considering a life-changing leap to greener pastures? This is an overview of some legal issues you’ll need to understand before you squeeze into an economy-class A380 seat and hurtle toward your new life. We’ll look at visas, tax, pensions, and divorce laws.

Disclaimer: I’m not a legal professional. My qualification is endless, exhilarating hours waiting in the crowded immigration offices of various foreign lands, negotiating bureaucracies, and checking out the multicultural talent. I’ve spent even longer hours boozing with grizzled veterans of the expat life, boasting or wailing of their experiences at the hands of the omnipotent authorities.


Unlike the West, plenty of foreign countries are pretty fussy about who they let in. And why shouldn’t they be? It’s their country. Remember, you don’t argue with the nightclub bouncer whose job is to keep out the riffraff. You put on a tie, or you take your business elsewhere.

There are four main categories of visas for living overseas long term:

Working Or Business Visas

These are visas that allow you to work or do business legally in another country. Unless you’re independently wealthy or planning on moving to a corrupt, third world country where such requirements can easily be flouted, you’ll probably need one of these bad boys. Yeah, I know Mexicans get away with doing cheeky illegal work in the US. That doesn’t mean you’re going to get away with it in Singapore.

Different countries vary widely in their requirements for a working visa. Some demand a university degree or need you to have a . . .

Read the rest of the article at Return of Kings.


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The Final Word From The Dark Side, January 31st 2016


Fuck Reddit.

Most of my Dark Side readers were coming from there.  One day nobody was dropping by so I investigated.  Turns out the Reddinquisition had shadowbanned me.  I complained and I got a reply, apparently from a human being who takes life very seriously, pontificating that I wasn’t commenting on other posts.  What cocks, following their own rules.  At least Stalin’s victims got a show trial – Reddit just gives you the bullet without ceremony.

So fuck them guys.  I’ll still post links but there will be fewer wacky Japanese schoolgirl knickers getting nicked by dodgy cop stories and more articles of interest to the discerning reader who is of equal or (more likely) somewhat higher intelligence than myself.

If you really like the dirty J-stories you can find them for yourself here.  People who use Reddit, feel free to post my stuff.  I’m not going to start a new account etc.

Rightio, let’s get started.  Fucking Reddit.

Delicious Tacos writes about everyone’s favourite topic: racial issues!

The Empty Subject Blog is having troubles with his new, bionic dick.

Over at Taki, all hell breaks loose when a Medievalist (those guys again!) goes off the reservation.  Steve Sailer tallies the complaints of the Oscar Grouches and finds them statistically wanting.

West Hunter has another account of an academic burned at the stake for Read More

Rock Bottom


Ten years ago:

The front door shuts and she’s gone.  The gentle ka-click firmly concludes three years of our lives.

Also, I am going to lose my job.

There’s a third, of course.  My father has been diagnosed with a chronic illness that will not end well.

Her leaving, the most recent of this week’s disasters, came as a surprise because I am young and retarded.  Didn’t see her drifting towards more accomplished cock.  And there she goes.  Will never suck on those massive tits again.  Never smell her neck that makes me swoon like it’s doused in opium.  Never wake beside her warm pajamas or see her sleeping face innocent of its daytime worry and affectation.

I’d come home and she was Read More

The Word From The Dark Side, January 22nd, 2016


If you came here from Reddit, read this.

A regular collection of obscure news and outlandish opinion.


Venus flytraps can count.  I wonder if they’re the only plant that can do this.

Man allegedly bites head off live rat, eats it, and posts graphic photos of his culinary feat on Facebook.  He is being investigated by the RSPCA.  Link contains said photos.

Air stewardess goes nuts on flight, gets the sack.

Anthropogenic climate change is the only thing saving us unappreciative apes from a grim fate.

Japanese women surveyed on what does and doesn’t constitute cheating on their boyfriend.  Interesting results.

Japanese cram school under fire for using erotic example sentences in language class.

Singaporean man fined a thousand bucks for spiking a female colleague’s drink with a love potion that contained poisonous ingredients.  Apparently he bought it online.

Nazi parody anime appears in Japan.  It also contains schoolgirls in Read More

I Stared Into the Abyss

Another time, another place.

I’m staring around my blue painted room in panicked desperation.  The computer, tabs flicking between Word and AltaVista’s ‘asian blowjob’ search results.  A gothic poster that I hoped would look cool if a girl ever came here.  Books from my recent childhood.  My family unheard, in bed, perhaps asleep.  It’s late.  I’ve been drinking coffee.  My heart races unevenly.

Do they know?

I can’t focus because of the gloomy pit of despair that twists like a cruel, bloated worm from my throat to my bowels.  It’s there most of the time.  Been there for years, growing and squirming inside me.  I wake up to it and fall asleep with it.  I’m sometimes amazed that I’m still alive.  How can I feel like this, for so long, and yet move and breathe like a normal person?  The feeling is so physically and emotionally painful that I’m sure it must eventually give me cancer or a heart attack.  Sometimes I hope that it does.  I am twenty but I feel like an old man looking back at my insubstantial life with regret.

I have few friends.  The ones I have are getting sick of me and are trying to fade away but I persist, turning up at parties to which I have not been invited, ignoring their embarrassed confusion, talking hopelessly to girls even I find unattractive.  I have no girlfriend.  I have no achievements to my name.  I stare at the ceiling, thinking again of my parents who have their own problems.

Do they know?

I roll over, flick again to the back pages of the local paper.  Advertisements for brothels.  There’s one not so far away, in an industrial area.  But, do I dare? Read More

The Word From The Dark Side, January 15th, 2016

A regular collection of obscure news and outlandish opinion.


Let’s have us a look, shall we.

Kindly Chinese man invites homeless woman to dinner and she kidnaps his three-year-old granddaughter.

Father accused of murdering three-year-old son because his girlfriend was not fond of children.

Man shot point-blank for mispronouncing ‘Newfoundland’.  Well okay, it was a while ago.

Japanese high school teacher, 37, arrested for Read More

The Word From The Dark Side, January 18th, 2015


Image socialised from earthtouchnews.com

A regular collection of obscure news and outlandish opinion.


Japanese man beats up convenience store clerk for not smiling enough.

Man arrested for sticking chopsticks in his daughter’s ear.

Young Japanese people don’t want sex or marriage.

Trannie gives high-pitched grumble after being forced to Read More

The Word From The Dark Side, January 1st, 2016.


A regular collection of obscure news and outlandish opinion.

I’d like to say this is going to be a bumper issue for the new year, but nope.  Just the same old shit.


For once, a Japanese news story devoid of vulgarity!  A giant squid swam in to a bay and was observed up close by locals.  They were surprised!  A local dive shop owner, with balls the size of hot air balloons, jumped in to film the creature.  His video is included in the article.  The squid eventually headed back out to sea without ravaging any local beauties.

Japan don’t want no foreign reffos.

Former Japanese head teacher who had sex with 12,000 Filipino prostitutes convicted of Read More